Multilingual Dating: Dating Someone Who Speaks Another Language?
Mar 8, From the fun to the problems, what is it really like to go out with someone who speaks an entirely different language to you?. Sep 11, If you tend to get bored in relationships or just haven't been super interested in anyone lately, dating someone who speaks another language. Sep 9, Miscommunications are a problem in any relationship, but can seem like an insurmountable challenge when your first languages are different.
Miscommunication Communication is crucial in any relationship. Having a foreign partner can lead to a lot of misunderstanding. When you speak your native language, you know exactly what you are saying and what it means. But when you are learning a new language, you often make mistakes. Or maybe you say something that ruins your plans. For example, in Vietnamese, I used to mix up the days of the week. You May Get Lazy If your partner is too easy on you, you may end up not working as hard as you would if you had a class or a tutor.
If they love you for who you are, they may not push you to learn more. When you go to a store, your partner is the pro.
When you go to a restaurant, they do all the ordering. While this is convenient, it does NOT help you improve your language skills. If your partner is not a certified teacher, they may not be confident and comfortable helping you with the language. Your partner may not want to be your teacher, so this could lead to a lot of problems as well. Below are the aspects of international relationships that can go both ways, depending on you, your partner and the situation. Personally, I find this fascinating.
The more I learn Vietnamese, the more I understand Vietnamese culture and the more I understand my girlfriend. I understood the jokes, we sang songs togetherand it got more exciting. This can be a bad thing, though. Sometimes you can learn things that you may not like.Things Bilingual People Do
For example, the more I learn Vietnamese, the more I swear in Vietnamese. My girlfriend hates this. You may also discover some things about your partner only when you fully understand the language and culture. Maybe she wants to learn your native language, so you end up doing some sort of language exchange. But again, do you want to be a teacher? Does she want to be a student? Now that we live in Japan, Ryosuke is the one who compares flights, finds hotels, and plans our vacations. We moved back in March and he was stuck doing the vast majority of the technical stuff — finding a new place to live, getting all our documents in order, figuring out moving companies, etc all the while, dealing with his last couple weeks at his old job.
It was really overwhelming for him. I tried to help out when I could, but over-all, I felt pretty useless. He can go to the doctors office by himself in America, but still needs me to take care of any English-speaking phone calls.
Marrying Someone who Speaks a Different Language: The Good, The Bad, and the Awkward
When one of us is in our element, the other one will feel like a fish out of water. He responds in Japanese. It works for us… most of the time. Japanese is never going to come as easily for me and English is never going to come as easily for him. Actually, that would be really awesome. Or have one partner who is foreign like me and one partner who is Japanese like Ryosuke.
Of course, I prefer hanging out with native English speakers. They get my humor. Of course, Ryosuke prefers hanging out with native Japanese speakers.
He can keep up with the conversation — even lead it if he wants. You know, to keep things fair. It was a good company but a bad fit.
I sat by Ryosuke holding his hand while he explained our decision to his parents. So I stay silent and trust my husband to speak for me. And when it comes to tense situations in English, he trusts me to convey his feelings to my family.
dating a person who speaks a different language - relationsips sex problems | Ask MetaFilter
He knows me; I know him. This applies even for weekend trips to wine country, but add on the added stresses and complications of international travel and you're in for a real adventure. Maybe you need a challenge in your life.
- Dedicated to your stories and ideas.
- Dating in Your Target Language: The Bad
- More From Thought Catalog
Challenges are good for us because they make us step up the plate in different ways, as well as be faced with the fact that we don't know everything there is to know. When we're never challenged we can even start to get a little rigid or arrogant in our beliefs, because we literally see the world in one way that's the right way.
We don't always like this because it means change, but it makes us more developed, more interesting, and more tolerant humans. Accents alone can be super hot, so listening to someone talk in a totally different language can definitely be music to your ears.
There does tend to be some stereotypes about the exotic foreigner who sweeps the girl off her feet and becomes some sort of once in a lifetime lover.
This might be true, and it might not be. There's probably something associated with the concept that foreign people are often in our lives for shorter periods of time, which makes any relationship seem safer and romantic. If he's going back to his home country at the end of the year you already know that your time is limited so what the hell, no holding back necessary.
Your ex might have seemed like he spoke a foreign language in the sense that he was a real jerk who couldn't communicate to save his life, but this guy is different. This guy can communicate just fine, he just can't quite do it with the same words as you.
Although to be fair, you might not actually know whether he would be a good communicator if you spoke the same language, since at the moment you still do not speak the same language. If he seems like a nice guy and he's treating you well, maybe it doesn't really matter what he's saying. You'll be so distracted trying to figure it out that you definitely won't be thinking about your ex-boyfriend, that's for sure.