Single Men, Consider the Single Mothers in Your Church | For The Church
Should a Christian single mom date? What does the Bible say about marrying a single mother? And what general dating advice is there for a. Note, I am not saying that young Christian men should lower their standards to include single moms, as if to say condescendingly “Hey, single. Dating as a Single Parent - Cliff Young & Laura MacCorkle - Read about Christian dating and get advice, help and resources on Christian single living.
But her motherhood does not disqualify her.
Her life circumstances might make dating a poor decision at times and if she puts her children at risk for the sake of dating then this is a sin. But overall, a Christian single mom should decide to date or not date just like every other Christian must decide. Am I mature enough to date right now? Is my heart in a good place with God to date right now? Am I ready to pursue marriage and not just date for fun? If a Christian single mom wants to date for godly reasons, she is free to pursue marriage just like every other Christian single is.
When a Christian single mom wants to date to find a godly husband, she should first spend the necessary time addressing the sins and wounds of her past so she can live a better future. Again, she should never regret or feel bad about having a child! But she will need to separate the gift of a child from the circumstances that lead to an out of wedlock pregnancy. What happened that led to the sin of premarital sex?
What unhealthy relationship practices are in her past? Everyone must ask questions like these before they start pursuing a godly spouse through Christian dating, not just a woman who had a child. While sins should be repented of, wounds should also be healed. What hurts are in her heart that occurred from bad relationships in her past? Or if she became a single mom because her husband died, obviously it would not be right to start dating until she was healed enough to be in a healthy relationship.
Overall, a Christian single mom is free to date, but like all Christians she should be wise and mature about this process and only seek to be in a relationship when she feels God is releasing her to do so and her heart is ready for it.
You have to follow God personally to answer that question. There are very few Christians single moms who need to be told not to sacrifice her child for a relationship. Moms in general are one of the most loving, sacrificial people groups in the world.
What most Christian single moms probably need to hear more is that while you must never put your dating life before your child, you must also not totally neglect the desires God has placed on your heart for a relationship. From my perspective, most of the times it is not required to choose mothering or dating. Of course during certain seasons this will be true, but at some point in life most Christian single moms will be able to do both.
If for a season or because of some unique circumstances you do need to choose between mothering and dating, you must choose mothering as God will hold you responsible for the health of the child he has entrusted to you.
For The Church
Additionally, if you have to sacrifice your children to get a guy to like you, this man will expect you to always put him first even if you get married. You need to prioritize your kids and be open about this prioritization when you date so you will attract a man who wants that life. A mom and a dad should not love their kids more than they love one another. However, they will need to prioritize their kids above one another, especially when the children are young. When I want to hang out with my wife after a long day but my 5 year old son and my 3 year old daughter are crying in their beds for their mom, we both know she needs to prioritize them over me.
You want a man with that perspective. He should expect you to love him in a special way that spouses should love each other, but a good dad knows that the kids come first in practical, day to day ways.
Therefore you must not pretend your life will be anything other than this to attract a guy. A single mom is just as beautiful and worthy of love and her children are not baggage.
Dating a single parent | Christian Connection Blog
They are gifts from God. But a single mom does come with more responsibility. When you are mature enough to handle it, responsibility is a blessing. If you have no responsibility in life, it means you have no impact and influence in life.
If we want to live a life of significance, we will have many responsibilities in life. Dating and social activities are good and should be pursued whenever they do not hurt the health of your children. When mom is living a healthy life, this benefits the kids. You will need the support of loved ones to help watch your child so you can pursue social activities and dating. I wish I could give you a concrete answer on what is too much social time and not enough mom time, but each situation is unique.
The age of your child, the support system you and your child have, and the importance of certain social events and dating opportunities must be factored into each decision. You must walk with God, prioritize your child, while also not forsaking your God given desires. Because you love your child, it is obviously painful to see him or her without a dad.
God created us to be raised by a father and a mother. What I really need are some single parent stress reducers. Single parent-led households have skyrocketed over the past decade all across Europe, Australia and the U. And many of these folks are single Christian parents. Christian Single Parents and Their Needs Single Christian parents have overwhelming spiritual, emotional and physical needs.
Yet, polls also show they are one of the least likely groups to attend church. Money saving worries have led some single parents to work several jobs in order to make ends meet, and they simply do not have the time.
Many others, however, feel excluded or stigmatized by the church, and so stay at home. In a nutshell, single parenting is stressful. Churches and single parent ministries have a great opportunity to show the love of Jesus in this area.
If you are a single Christian parent, and struggling with the burdens of life. You cannot do it all, no matter what that single parent prayer says. So take a bow you deserve it! Plan a little time just for you in order to recharge. Even Jesus got away into the wilderness to pray for a while, apart from his kids…the disciples! If that means a bubble bath and a great book, go for it.